So, LMK finally got his fall coaching check. Ching, ching! I've been wanting a new digital camera for months. We (and by we, I mean I) decided we'd use this check toward a new camera.
Now that the time has come, I can't decide.
I've got it in my head that I want this one. But little brother has some great things to say about Canons.
Here are the things I KNOW I want in my next camera:
Higher resolution - the one we have now is a 4mp and I'm not impressed.
Plug in battery. - I've spent a fortune on those lithium batteries.
The ability to take pictures at LMK's games. - I can sit pretty close (100-150ft) so I don't as long a zoom. If I can't get this in the camera, then I want the option to purchase a lens that will let me get in closer.
I'm also not very steady handed yet, so something that helps me do that would be great too.
So, blog readers, any suggestions? Cameras to avoid? One you absolutely love?
While my kids' first movie finishes saving I thought I would pop in here for a quick hi.
This week is going well. The school carnival is over (what a long day). I had a relatively nice day today, so I'm in a good mood. Smarty made my day as we lined up to go home. Check out her quote over in the left top corner.
First quarter tests are coming up and I'm getting nervous. It's like the dang state tests four times a year! Sheesh! Conferences next week. In-laws this weekend. Eep!
I'm still here. Things are better on a day to day basis. Some days are great. Others not so much. My first formal observation is over and I did well. So that's good news. Conferences are coming up and I'm the only one (besides the other new teacher) that seems to be getting ready for them. They're "optional" so it's up to us to schedule everything. Gee, thanks. Not too impressed with my team leader/mentor lately, but I'm sure I'll get over it.
I've decided we're going to read The Chocolate T.ouch in reading instead of the stupid basal (which is too hard for my kids anyway), so I'm gathering stuff for that. Any suggestions would be great.
You know that graphic they show every first year teacher about the stages first year teachers go through? Well, I think I'm ahead of the game.
I hit Survival really quickly and I'm coasting at, what feels like, jet speed into Disillusionment. People keep throwing papers and meaningless testing at me. Things I "have to do" yet, we don't use for anything. I hate doing assessments just because everyone does them. Couldn't we get some more definite reasons why I have to give these tests?
Plus, I'm supposed to test kids during class. Uh, yeah, not gonna happen. I have one of the lower classes and they constant supervision. They're not bad, they just get into trouble when they're not perpetually busy.
Everyone is busy, so it's not just me. However, no one can seem to take a second to explain things to the new teachers. Just because you're familiar with how to give the Smith test, doesn't mean I am. Don't even get me started on W.ords Their W.ay. I think it's ridiculous to spend hours and hours planning for spelling when it's only 15 minutes (at best) of my reading block. I don't have time to piddle around with spelling.
Speaking of reading class, that one is keeping me up at night. Right now, I have a really good group. I have a mix. They're all below grade level so I chose a 3rd grade book to read as my reading instruction. It seems to be going well. They're comprehending and everything (who woulda thunk it?). That being said, Monday they're switching up my group. I'm getting anywhere from 5 to 10 new kids and sending a few up or down. I'm terrified I'm going to be stuck where the other new teacher is - with a "wild" group of kids and no curriculum because they're all so far below grade level. Add to that the fact that none of my kids qualify for Title I services so I can't get any help for my kids and I'm scared.
Luckily, I have a friend in the same boat. I'm so glad there are 2 new 4th grade teacher. I don't know what I'd do if everyone else had their shit completely together and I was the only one struggling. As I told my friend last night, I'm a great actor. I may act like I've got everything together, but on the inside, I'm drowning. All I'm trying to do right now is keep my head above water.
My house is a mess and we're hosting a party at the end of the month. Laundry is backed up. My car is mess. I've got piles and piles of papers to grade. I don't have time to cook therefore we eat junk and expensive junk at that. I bet I've gained weight since school began not lost it like my colleague. Have I mentioned money woes? I did exactly what I figured I would do. I got lax about keeping track of the money we spent and thus Quicken is out of date and I have no idea where our bank balance is currently teetering. If the rough numbers I put in tonight at right, we're in trouble for the next week and a half. Time to start cleaning out the freezer! I really should just stop eating. I'd be saving money AND losing weight. Two birds with one stone.
Pay also really bums me out. Between insurance, NEA dues, 403(b) withdrawls, and random taxes over half of my check is deducted. $1000 a month (give or take) sure seems like crappy pay.
Bottom line. I'm really missing my mom right now. She could be such a huge help to me in the classroom. LMK tries to help and he's a good guy to have around (Except when he says, "Well, you knew you'd be busy and have to put in a lot of time when you went into this career." Not helping, honey.).
I just feel so lost. So tired. So overwhelmed. So inferior.
After school today, I grabbed my gear and raced out of the building so I could make it to LMK's soccer game this afternoon. The first one I've been to all year! Of course, I think I left some book order money at school. At least, I hope it's at school. Otherwise, I've lost it and that's just a whole kettle of fish I'm not ready to open right now. I'll worry myself an ulcer this weekend and find it first thing Monday.
LMK's game was pretty darn good. The guys played well and even though they only tied, it was a great game to watch. Yaaaaay, team. That being said, LMK has had quite a week. When I met him after the game, we immediately got into a conversation about soccer, his job, and his department head (**cough, cough** jack ass **cough, cough**). My usually observant husband never asked me about my day. So dear blogging world, you get to hear about it instead.
One of my kiddos has been diagnosed with OCD. I'm not surprised at all. This student walks around with his arms up so that he doesn't have to touch anything, washes his hands constantly, and won't eat his lunch if he thinks someone looked at it crossways. They put him on a medication and all I can do is hope it makes a difference for the best. His mom doesn't know just how closely I've dealt with mental illness. I'm grateful I can be his teacher. Just another reason I had to get through LMK's illness. Maybe I can help this student.
My new student is proving to be quite the behavior problem. Yesterday, I sent home detention slips with him and another young thug-in-training (do the abbreviation.....ahahahaha, ok, moving on) because they were caught where they aren't allowed when they were to be at breakfast plus some other misbehavior here and there. I threatened them with loss of recess until I got the forms back and both showed up today. I no more than saw those than the principal came to get them, again.
Evidently, they've been "stealing" food in the cafeteria. I use the word stealing loosely because the aides have been allowing them to eat whatever food is left on the trays that are "pushed to the middle of the table". They're putting the kabosh on the food free for all, but the principal investigated further. My two darlings basically told her they're just hungry. Lunch isn't all that impressive - a protein and 2 pieces of fruit/sides. It's all to common in this country. One goes home to ramen noodles shared with two teenage brothers and the other doesn't have much either. Since our lunch is very late, we've been allowing the students to bring snack.
Well, now we have to have snack for the entire class. The principal made the comparison of inviting someone to your home, eating, and not letting them have any. I can understand that, but here's the problem.
Just where do I draw the line at providing for these kids?
I already provide notebooks, composition books, pencils, crayons, markers, science supplies, books, etc, etc, etc for the students who need them. It's a common teacher lament, I know. Now I'm supposed to get enough snack for the class, too?
Luckily, the principal is aware of the financial strain that causes and is looking into ways to supplement the snack, which I appreciate. Half of me feels sorry for these children. That's all they are afterall, children. I never had to sit through school and be hungry. They shouldn't have to either. No child should have to be hungry.
That being said, they are in trouble constantly. Constantly. Every class, the teacher is telling me how they were misbehaving. They don't do it in my class because I've come down on them. Hard. I'm even pulling out the "I'm so disappointed in you" speech. So I spend my day vacillating between wanting to strangle them and wanting to bring them home and "save" them from this horrible life.
In other news, I finally got a smart board in my room. It's not mine, I'm using one of the one's the school has for teacher's to checkout. I love it! How did I ever teach without this thing? How will I teach when they take it back? It's the bestest toy - EVER! There is so much I want to do with it. I'm already doing my morning journal on the Smart Board. The kids love to come up and correct sentences on it. Today, I found a spelling game where the kid's can click and drag computer magnets. I love technology.
Add to that new teacher responsibilities, house responsibilities, LMK's school responsibilities, and family responsibilities and I'm just zonked. No wonder so many teachers quit in the first three years!
Hand in hand with all the "bad" things about teaching are the good things. I like to think I'm pretty strict with my students regarding behavior. I expect them to be leaders in the school and make good choices. Nine out of ten of them live up to that. Then there are the kids who live to please you. The silliness. The laughter and the learning. The hugs - except from Touchy Feely Kid, I don't want to have my boobs nuzzled like my colleague. Eek. Teaching is the hardest, longest, best job I've ever had. I just can't wait to feel like I'm doing it well, not just acting like a teacher.
Thanks for reading through all this, if you're still here, I needed to share it with someone. Have a great weekend!
Well, after almost 60 hours spent at school this week I am finally home! Tuesday was Open House until 8. Wednesday was staff development until 5. Thursday was new teacher stuff. Add meetings every day during my supposed break and I'm sick and tired of school.
I stayed until 6 tonight to get my lesson plans done. I'm very excited about them. They're my best ones yet. They won't make it until next Friday, but darn it, I hope one of the administrators comes in to observe me on Monday (I've gotten informal observations every week so far). I'm ready, dag nabbit!
Highlights of the week:
Had my first fight Tuesday. One of my kids got punched in the face by one of the other new 4th grade teacher's kids. Suspensions all around and the parents of my kid are pressing charges. Good for them!
As I was leaving tonight at six o'clock I ran into the new 1st grade teacher. "Oh, I figured I was the only one here." I commented. Then New 3rd Grade Teacher walked in. Soon after New Music Teacher arrived. Yep, the new people were the only ones left at school - and no wonder with all the meetings we've had this week. Sheesh.
I've got a grade full of five finger bandits. I caught three of them stealing candy from me on Tuesday. Want to know what makes Mrs. cuss like a sailor? Stealing. LMK will attest that I dropped a lot of F-bombs that evening. Today, someone stole another student's snack. They're gonna push me too far and then be in a world of hurt.
One of the other 4th grade teachers leaves as soon as the bell rings and takes nothing home with her. What am I doing wrong!?
I still feel like I'm floundering. I guess that's how I'm supposed to feel. New Fourth Grade Teacher feels the same way only she's got a cold, too. She's really down. It's no wonder so many teachers quit in the first 3 years. Good gravy.
I'm kind of annoyed because the two new teachers have the low reading group and then we have the opposite grouping for math. Sounds fair, right? Wrong. Our reading textbook is too hard for our kids. So we're having to dig up resources just to fill our 45 minutes of reading and spelling. Yes, you read that right, 45 minutes. Good luck getting anything accomplished in that amount of time. Even if we had the low math kids, we'd still have a textbook to use. Right now, my kids are doing a book study (which means I'm sure they'll fail their first quarter district test) and the other teacher is just trying to get her kids to read. I'm sorry, it just seems like we got the short end of the stick.
Second week of school is almost done and I'm still ok. I must be doing something wrong because I don't seem to be struggling as much as the other new fourth grade teacher.
I love my kids. They're wonderful. LMK and I spent the evening yesterday in the ER. One of his players was injured and needed medical attention. (We're afraid its a torn ACL, but we're hoping and praying its not. Please keep him in your thoughts.) So I mentioned to my kids that we were out late because one of Mr.'s soccer kids got hurt. I explained that his family lives in another country so we went to the hospital with him like his mom and dad would have if they were here. Pretty soon, I have kids coming up to me asking for paper. "What do you need paper for?" I asked.
"We want to make Mr.'s player a get well card."
Can we just stop a minute so I can gush about my kids?
They came up with this on their own! I'm so proud of them.. The cards are hilarious by the way.
Student #1: "What's his favorite color? Is it pink? Pink's my favorite color so I think I'll use that." Me: "I'm sure he loves pink. Your card looks great." Student #2: "What color is his hair?" Me: "Red." Student #2: "Does he have an earring?" Me: "Uh no, they're not allowed to have earrings at his school." Student #3: "What's his favorite animal?" Me: "Ummmm, I don't know. Why don't you draw your favorite animal and ask him his?"
The only bad thing about the day was when I tried to share their wonderfulness with my team. LMK's injured player is from a middle eastern country, no, not that one, the other one. I was telling them how we had to take him to the ER since his ACL might be torn and Team Leader, trying to be funny says, "Wow, I'm surprised they didn't shoot him."
Everyone thought that was just sooooooooooo funny.
I'm sorry. I didn't find it funny. I still don't. This kid is 17 years old and just because of where he was born he's a bad person? Seriously!? He's a good kid. He's polite, well-mannered, and a hard worker. He made a point to tell me "they grow up to be bad people." ARE YOU SERIOUS!? Call me naive, but he's in this country trying to get an education so that he can have a better life. Doesn't that count for anything?
As I told LMK, this player is my official favorite. He's also the player I yelled at a few weeks ago because he was pushing and he's better than that. He and I have a bond.
How can people be so ignorant? It makes me really sad. Really. Really. Sad.
The first day went well. In fourth grade, most of the kids are still excited about being back in school. If you're nice to them, they'll love you. I also showed them my All About Mrs. movie, which they loved. Some of my kids have seen it 6 times and still ask to see it again. I call that a success. They really just love seeing the pictures of the cats, but I'll take it.
I have a student that goes to the beach every year the first week of school. Mom asked me for homework a week before school started. I didn't have the heart to tell her I was taking things hour by hour and planning the second week of school, uh, not gonna happen. The first day of school she arrives early and asks if I have her daughter's homework ready. Uh, no. Just trying to make it through the day. "Well, we're leaving on Friday!" Yeah, yeah, yeah I'll get something to you. I got homework around Wednesday night, it'll just have to work. Good enough for government work.
Another student suffers from a medical condition that makes him throw up randomly. Uh, I don't do throwing up. Luckily, there haven't been any problems...yet.
Same student's parent asked that I refrain from giving him candy. Fine. I can understand that, especially with a kid with ADHD. HOWEVER! Every day, he has brought a different kind of candy from home. What the hell!? I can't give him a jolly rancher, but he can bring a container of Warheads with him? He's also the only one bucking the water bottle rule. My kids can have a water bottle with water in it. I told them, no powdered drink mixes for the water. Just water. First day, he brings Gatorade. I told him it has to be just water. "Okay, Mrs." he replied. The next day, he brings fitness water. Flavored fitness water. For the love of Pete, water. W-A-T-E-R.
We've already got a problem parent. The kicker? She's another teacher in my school! Our team decided as a "goal" 4th graders have to know their multiplication tables. Since it's a 3rd grade standard, we figured that's fair. We are going to give timed multiplication tests at least once a week. To "pass" you have to get at least a 90% three times. If you don't know your times tables, you can't get an A. I think that's fair. Thoughts? She went to the administration about it. Too bad it was the administration's idea. Heh.
For the first week we had to eat lunch with our children. Oy.. Vey. The kids love it, but really, I'd like a few moments to myself. They're going to be sad next week when Mrs. leaves them in the lunchroom and goes to put her head down on her desk.
Friday just about killed me. I think I've mentioned my 0 tolerance of heat, right? Well, I get to school on Friday and the air conditioning in the fourth grade wing isn't working. WHAT!? They call the repair guy and I figure we'll just deal. I've got a fan, we'll survive. By lunch we were melting. I finally felt the air kick at 2:30. The kids leave at 3. Did I mention the bank clock said it was 108° today? I told the office I was seriously considering getting the personal air conditioners I saw at T.arget. I'd just take it with me wherever I went.
Don't tell the other teacher's on my team, but I think I got the best classes. How do I know? Well, yesterday I had the team leader's class for science. Oh. my. goodness. It was bedlam! He has all the inclusion kids in his class and it was...in a word, bedlam. The special ed teacher was there as a co-teacher to help and that's the only reason I made it through the class. He's talking about having to teach another class during the afternoon. I told him after school, "Please, please don't leave me alone with these children. PLEASE!" He laughed. When is a good time to tell him, I'M NOT KIDDING!
My homeroom is great. Sure, they get squirrelly. They're 9! However, they listen and they're kind. I'll plan four different subjects, just let me keep my own kids! After team leader's kids yesterday afternoon I love my homeroom!
I was talking to Mo Mom about the bedlam in my room yesterday and she laughed and said, "Oh, it's like a class full of Wild Childs" (Wild Child is another nickname for her middle daughter). I told her she needed to go hug that little girl and tell her how wonderful she is because I would take a class of Wild Childs over this class, any day.
Right now, I'm doing anything to avoid finishing next week's lesson plans. Reading seems to be overwhelming me. I have the low average group and I'm just not quite sure what to do with them. Any teacher-y people have any suggestions?
at least win the fight. Let me tell you about our weekend.
LMK's parents came down this weekend so we could go to LMK's first game as a head coach. Yes, it was a scrimmage tournament, but they really wanted to be there to support him and I wouldn't have to drive 2 hours into PA by myself.
Saturday morning we drove to PA. I forgot my camera - damnit and we missed the turn and had to ask some upstanding citizen for directions. (He was skeery.) I should have known the day was doomed at that point.
When we finally found the campus, I was impressed. It was beautiful! Most of the facilities were new, or like new. They were amazing. We finally found the soccer fields and parked. We found a nice place to sit and watched the second half of LMK's first game. It wasn't great, but there were a lot of good things happening. About halfway through the second half of his game, I started to wonder about the referee. He wasn't in official referee uniform and he basically called a foul every time someone went down. But in the time LMK has been a coach, I've learned bad refs are the rule, not the exception. I did get a little more suspicious when he was calling the opposing team by name.
After that game, we walked up to the upper field where LMK's remaining three games were to be played. At the start of the second game, I realized there were no offical (licensed) referees. Parents and coaches were reffing the games. LMK's second game went well. He put his JV kids in and they were fantastic! They were better than the varsity kids from the previous game. It was a great game to watch.
The third game started ok, but quickly escalated. While none of the refs had control over the game, this guy was a joke. A player on the other team started pushing and shoving with one of LMK's seniors. Senior Guy had enough and, as my father in law says, "mugged" him. He grabbed him around the waist and they were scuffling. The ref was busy telling Bobby, his player, to knock it off. No cards were issued because no one had any! The game resumed and the other player started in on Senior Guy again. They were pushing and shoving down the sideline with the ball when the teacher in me took over.
"Senior Guy," I shouted, "knock it off, you're better than that!" They stopped pushing and as Senior Guy walked back he looked up at me. Oops. Well, LMK did say I could cheer at the games and as much time as I spend with these kids I think of them as my own. Besides, he was better than that. LMK's kids have class and I expect them to act like it.
At half time, my in-laws were hungry so we left to find some lunch. Halfway through dinner, my cell phone rings. It's LMK and he sounds really upset. Long story short, in the second half one of the opposing team's players pulled one of LMK's kids down and another player started punching him. Three more of the opposing team started in to "help" their teammate beat up one of LMK's kids when his "enforcer" came in and took out all five guys. LMK's kids are starting to get off the bench to go help their teammate when LMK shouts, "FREEZE!" He said everyone on the field and on the bench froze - including the opposing team.
The opposing team's coach starts to play for the fans, saying, "Coach, if you can't control your players I'm taking my kids off the field." An idiot on LMK's team starts to talk back, but LMK told him to shut up. At that point, LMK pulled his kids not only from the game, but from the tournament. The last team they were to play had 5 injured players due to lack of referees and they weren't going to keep injuring kids either.
LMK yelled at his players and then told them to get ready to go home. LMK hates to be the bad guy, but fighting cannot and will not be tolerated. As they were leaving, they find out the AD at the school is an alumni of LMK's school. Craaaaaaaaaaaaap. LMK got a phone call on the way home from the President of the school. Luckily, the School's kids didn't start the fight, didn't throw any punches, and listened to LMK. It was really the best possible outcome for a bad situation. LMK said the bus was incredibly quiet on the ride home.
When they got home, I went up to meet LMK and help him unload equipment. While he went to check on one of his players who may have needed a trip to the emergency room I stood outside and talked with one of his stalkers. As we're talking one of his players comes out. He came over to me and said, "Coach is pissed."
"Yeah," I replied, "Coach is pretty pissed." (He's really not, but he wants them to think he is. He doesn't want this kind of thing happening again.)
"He started talking after the game, and he just kept ratcheting up. And then, he was yelling! Coach doesn't yell. I've had him in class. He never yells. Coach is really mad."
Negatives
No referees
Players involved in a fight
Level of play needs work
Positives
LMK's players didn't start the fight and didn't throw any punches.
LMK's players stood up for their teammates. They acted like a team.
No one got hurt.
The team listened to LMK when he told them to "FREEZE!"
JVs had a GREAT game.
The team is genuinely upset that they disappointed Coach. To me, that means they respect him. This is good.
We also watched the Hokie football festivities. The game day stuff was very moving and it got to me. However, I'll never be embarassed of my Hokie family. It's hard for people who didn't go to Tech to understand just how tight a unit the university and community is there. Sometimes, you just have to experience it to know. Watching the game made me want to go back. We haven't been back since I graduated in 2003. I want to go back. Part of me needs to go back. To see it and to experience it myself.
We are the Hokies. We will prevail. We are Virginia Tech.
Since I'm being a bad blogger and not checking in much, I'm shocked that Misty would think of me. Misty is the artist formerly known as Molly here on my blog. She's one of my best friends, even though she followed her husband, my cousin, to Missouri. He's a big goober, but she's great. I wonder if they'd allow me to swap him for her in the family department. Hmmm, something to ponder.
Anyway, thanks Misty for my two awards. I've never gotten an award before so I'm thrilled.
What's new at school, you ask? I'm trying to make it through the day without officially losing my shit. That is all. :)
First, thank you all for your wonderful words of support. They mean a lot. It's nice to hear them. And a special thanks to Mike. My teacher friend will be thrilled to get some sort of answer to our burning Swedish question.
Today was a better day. Mainly because I went to school today with the attitude that it was going to be a better day. It actually helped. It also helped that I wasn't bombarded with paperwork. Good gravy the trees we're killing! I stayed late tonight (until 7) and put a lot of stuff away in my room. I'm finally less stressed about the room looking and being ready for Open House next week. I'm meeting the other new teacher at school on Sunday so we can work in our rooms for a while. Hopefully, I will be ready at that point. I'm hoping to be able to enjoy Labor Day weekend with the in-laws.
Regarding mentors: Yes, I have a mentor. He's also my team leader and a really great guy (except for a huge character flaw of hating cats). I've talked to him some about the mean teacher and he's assured me it's not personal. She's just dingy. That being said, they're also friends since she was on the team last year. So, I don't want to say too much because I don't know who to trust yet.
Well, write it down. It only took them a week to break me. Technically, half a day.
Today was our back to school orientation. The paperwork. The meetings. The training. Everyone I meet is handing me papers and telling me what I should do with them. I've met what seems like hundreds of new people. My room isn't ready. The psycho in my room before me is a bitch. No other word for it. Planning has me so terrified I don't know where to begin. And school is starting soon!
First, the psycho drama. Last night, she came into my room and disconnected the dvd/vcr combo. It was hers and it's fine that she took it. I would have liked to have been told she was going into my room, but whatever. She left the vcr that was in her room on my counter. Not hooked up, not plugged in, and with a dvd that I had accidentally left in the other player tossed on top. I feel completely violated. Who knows what else she's come in and taken. Be an adult and come to me and say, "I accidentally left my dvd/vcr here, can I switch them?" I'm not going to say no.
LMK urged me to lock my room at night when I leave. Great idea, honey! There's just one problem. She hadn't turned in her key for that room. That's right, she had my key all summer! The secretaries cornered her today and got it back, but what the hell.
The other problem is I spend every day feeling completely stupid. I swear, everything I learned in college is gone. GONE. Now I have diagnostic tests to give that I have never heard of while I have students in the room. How do I take one kid to the hall to administer a test while I have 25 others sitting in the room. Number one rule of teaching - never leave them alone!
Everyone on my team has such great, creative ideas. Most of the time I feel like a bumbling fool. They explained how we were dividing kids up today. Everyone is furiously scribbling text scores and I'm still trying to figure out how exactly to do it. I feel like it takes me a second (ok several minutes) longer than everyone else to pick things up. I feel like I'm always scrambling to catch up. Lesson plans? I have no lesson plans, I have no idea where to even start planning.
Everyone keeps telling me how great I'm going to be. Well, I'm not so sure. I spend the day feeling inferior and trying to catch up. I know I'm putting a lot of unneeded pressure on myself and I know it. I don't want to make mistakes. I don't want to look weak. I don't want people to look at me and think, "Why did they hire her?" But I wonder that every day.
To add insult to injury, we watched a really cute video today and it was about a school near my hometown in Ohio. (Near as in - my dad attended high school there) As I'm watching the video it hits me. This is not where I expected to be starting my teaching career. I wish I was in my old district, where I knew everyone and everyone knew me. Worst of all, I miss my mommy. She'd know what to do. She'd be helping me and giving me advice and I wouldn't feel so alone.
The saga, coupled with my other feelings were just too much. Luckily, I have a wonderful husband who got lunch with me and "talked me down". We're good for each other.
When I thanked him tonight, he told me that he would have never gotten through his first few months of teaching without me telling him he would be fine and he was doing a good job. He said he was going to do the same for me. At that point, I laughed and told him, "The difference is, I know you're lying." Even he had to laugh at that.
I have been sitting in new teacher in-service sessions all week hoping to earn a ticket that will be called for a door prize. Tonight we had a reception for new teachers in my district as well as LMK's school. He came at the last minute (his boss saw me and called LMK to come down after I'd shoo'd LMK out when I didn't see anyone else from his school there).
Well, new teacher in-service is almost over. I must admit, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. At times, it's almost fun. If you ignore all the get to know you games that I hate and the group work. Each day there are door prizes and they give us lunch. True we have to sit through a presentation by whoever is sponsoring the lunch, but I think that is the least we can do for a free meal.
The only thing I do not like is the seating. We are either in an auditorium with the old, old, old style wooden seats or we're in the cafeteria on round stools attached to tables. By lunch time my ass hurts! It's awful. My tail bone still aches. Friday was so bad that with two hours to go a bunch of us were standing up, just so we didn't have to sit on those seats.
Everyone I've met has been really, really nice. They're so grateful to have us here that it makes me excited to work there. Yes, I have tons of meetings, but really, who needs sleep?
The trip to Chicago was great for another reason. LMK picked up a "part-time" job. Really, it's more like a consulting job. He's officially a staff coach for US Soccer. It sounds more impressive than it is, but it's still really exciting. It could be up to a year or so before he's needed, but it's still an honor. He's thrilled and it will make a fabulous addition to his resume. Woohoo!
We're finally back from Chicago! Why did it seem like we were gone for a month?
Anyway, I learned one very important thing in Chicago. I am NOT a big city girl. There's way too much concrete, asphalt, and people. And holy moly is it expensive. Good gravy!
Friday night after we arrived, checked in, and got settled we had quite a dining experience. LMK chose a restaurant that was close to the hotel and sounded inexpensive and reasonable. We ended up at Dick's Last Resort which was listed as a bar and grill. I knew we were in trouble when the waitress told us that sometimes they can be a "little rude". Mind you, this is after she was yelling at some other table. Me? I was terrified. I turned on my good teacher manners and "please" and "thank you"'d myself to death. Twin got saucy with her. To each his own, I guess. The food was good though and after I relaxed a little I had a good time. I even wrote on the table! Scandalous!
Later, we walked over to the Lego store (just as it was closing). LMK looked almost giddy at the lifesize R2D2 and Darth Vader made from Legos. Bet me we have a picture of him with them. Heh. Boys.
On Saturday, Twin and I decided to walk to Navy Pier. First, it looked a lot closer from our hotel. Then I wore the wrong shoes (totally my fault) and my feet hurt almost immediately. Lastly, it was hot. I don't handle hot well. Then put me on a medicine that makes me intolerable to heat and I get down right bitchy. But, now I can say I've been there and it wasn't ALL bad. They have these cute bike carts you can rent. I so wanted to go that. It looked like lots of fun.
Saturday night we ordered Chicago hot dogs (not too bad) and Chicago deep dish pizza (yummy!). Sunday, Twin and I decided to go to Shedd Aquarium before the soccer game at 12. If LMK had dropped us off before parking at Soldier Field it wouldn't have been too bad, but once again the heat and the distance killed us.
Good things about Chicago (according to me):
Chicago Deep Dish Pizza
Shedd Aquarium with the indoor oceanarium - too cool!
Chicago hot dogs
The nice Chicago lady who gave us directions when we were standing looking completely lost on a street corner.
LMK's Coaching Symposium
Seeing one of the refs for the game at our hotel
US National Team Game
Seeing LMK practically giddy while enjoying the game - I would go back to Chicago if it meant he'd be this happy again.
Before I end this post, let me do one little soccer rant. This being my first time at a national team event I was surprised and impressed by the national team at the end of the game. In 100 degree heat, after shaking hands with the New Zealand team, they ran a lap around the stadium waving to the fans and thanking them for coming. Just one more reason to love soccer, I guess. They're good to their fans. They're good role models.
LMK and I are on our way to Chicago via Ohio. We'll stop off in Ohio for a few days and then leave out to Chicago on Friday with Twin. LMK is so excited about the coaching conference that he can frequently be found squealing with glee around the house. It's cute to see an almost 30 year old man grinning while he "eeeeeeeeeeee"'s around the house.
While we travel our thoughts and prayer will be with the 6 miners trapped in Utah. Living with a mining engineer means I understand what happened and am thankful he is not a practicing mining engineer. They've brought in listening equipment which means his graduate project is being used. Hopefully they have good news.
Coaching might not pay a lot, but after Quecreek and Sago, names I will never forget, I'm just happy I can come home each night and kiss my husband.
Christi asked where I got 30 white board for $15. Simple! I got a piece of shower board from Lowe's and had my father-in-law cut it down for me. He actually bought 2 sheets and cut about 48 12" x 15" boards. I took 30 and my mother in law took the rest.
They're great and really inexpensive! If you don't have a father-in-law to cut them for you, the store will do it, but they usually charge per cut. However, it's still cheaper than buying white board from any of the school supply catalogs.
Erin just posted an ingenious post about the high cost of being a teacher. She makes a lot of really good points that I won't make again so if you haven't clicked over there to read it - DO IT!
I have the opportunity to compare LMK's school budget with my own needs. Frankly, the only thing LMK has purchased for his classroom is a specific kind of dry erase markers. He writes A LOT and the generic type provided by the school run out too quickly for him. Everything else he can saunter over to the administrative offices and they'll give him what he needs. Paper clips, staples, file folders, etc. Me, I have to buy those things with my "allotment". As a first year teacher, I lucked out this year and got a total of $400 to spend. I needed every penny with the stuff I had to buy. (I am expected to furnish/purchase my own post-its, paper clips, staples, chalk, dry erase markers, folders, erasers, staplers, etc.)
LMK also has a fabric covered bulletin board which I insisted he needed and I put up. I love it. I will be adding fabric backgrounds in my room as time and money allow. He'd be happy with a basic paper covered board if I didn't horn my way in and try to make him look good. Otherwise, his room is pretty basic. He's not interested in a lot of posters on the wall (though I've been trying to convince him these are important, he's just not into it) and the main theme in his room is soccer. Shocker. I tried to convince him he needed matching curtains, but the lip sneer and the disdainful "No, thanks honey." told me how he really felt. Heh. Boys.
Now, my room is much better. If I must say so myself (and I must).
My purchases include:
Fabric for curtains - $50
Curtain rods (which are actually shower curtain rods) - $40
Fabric covers for bookshelves and file cabinet - $30
Border - $15
Student mailboxes - $40 (on sale, I heart T.arget)
We're home from West Virginia. We had a lovely week. The Queen Mother...no...the King Mother...LMK's mother and I went shopping. Lots and lots of shopping! The woman had no idea that Staples has HUGE sales in July. She's been paying full price in August. Heh. I've corrupted her now. She's addicted. She pretty much cleaned them out of the $0.78 two pack of composition notebooks and she should never purchase pencil tip erasers again (35 boxes, 12 in a box makes for 420 erasers, sheesh!)
I have a lot of the stuff on my list that I needed for my classroom now.
She and I even made curtains. I ironed them (how I loathe ironing) and she sewed them. I still think she got the cushy job. SITTING in front of an air conditioner while I STOOD in the basement beside a hot iron. Have I mentioned I hate ironing? Hate it with a passion now. However, since she was sewing and I don't know how, I decided to suck it up. LMK got the brunt of my whining. Lucky him.
We also saw I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. It was nothing like what I thought it was going to be and I really enjoyed it. LMK has promised me a trip to see Hairspray and Chick-Fil-A since we wussed out last week before Harry Potter was released. Also, by the by, my book that I pre-ordered from Amazon that I was told wouldn't arrive until the 24 unless I upgraded to paid shipping (I had the free shipping) arrived at 10:30 on the 21st.
It is finally H.arry P.otter time! Woo-friggin'-hoo.
LMK and I will be heading to Large City this evening to try and get a book. We preordered our book back in March from Amazon, but I couldn't upgrade the shipping like I wanted to so we'll be getting that book sometime next week. Meanwhile, LMK and I will be heading to West Virginia tomorrow. This does not please the King. (Truth be told, I'm ok with having two books.)
So this evening we're going to head to Large City. We're getting dinner at Chick-Fil-A, which I love and will use any excuse to eat there. Then we're going to go see H.airspray. We'll probably tootle around Pe.tsmart, T.arget, and the school supply store in the process.
Heck, we might just leave for West Virginia and stop at a 24 hour Wal-Mart.
I'm done at school! At least until we get back from West Virginia. I've done just about everything I can do without LMK's help and some key purchases.
I still have one bulletin board left to do, but I can't do it until they install my new whiteboard and re-glue the cork board. It is going to be my classroom jobs board. Right now, I have no idea what to do for that board. I have a Helping Hands board that is really cute or a notebook paper/thumbtack idea, but I'd like to do something different. Any suggestions?
My favorite bulletin board is my lunch count board. MY 4th grade teacher had this board. Each day, the kids come in and pick their lunch decision. I can tell at a glance who is absent and who is buying hot lunch, cold lunch, salad, etc.
Everything is pushed to the left side of the board so that the kids won't have to climb all over the computer to get to their name. I'm concerned it's going to be a bit tall for 4th graders so I might pick up my grandfather's old step stool when we're in Ohio. That should give the kids enough of a boost to reach the highest crayon. I tried to put the less popular lunch options at the top, too.
I also put up a bulletin board my mom did several years ago. It's called a pocket dictionary. I used library card pockets with the letters of the alphabet on them. This way, when kids need to know how to spell a word, they can bring me the Ss card or the Ff card and we can add it to the card for the next person who needs to know how to spell that word.
Since I didn't get to order some small pocket dictionaries for each student, I figured this would work instead. I didn't laminate the library book pockets so I hope they will hold up throughout the year. If not, I'll know to laminate them for next time!
Updated to add: I forgot to mention my current favorite thing about teaching. Blah, blah, blah impacting young lives. But honestly, I can order these and horde them all for me. Mmmmm, THESE are what being a teacher is all about. I got the big box with the "new" scents. Some are ok, some are NOT. Give me purple, red, blue, dark green, and brown any day. The new light blue and light green smell yummy, though. (Click on the picture to make them larger. You know so you can read all the scents.)
until my first injury in the classroom. While interning, I missed a chair and fell in front of my third graders. Then while student teaching I slipped on some black ice right before school started one morning.
Yesterday, while working in my room, I flipped myself out of my desk chair. I knew they were slippery on tile floor, but evidently they're just as rolly on carpet. I come by it naturally though, my mother fell off a desk one year working in her classroom.
I should have known it was going to be a bad week after the desk chair. This afternoon, I was standing on a chair hanging posters. When I "hopped" down my ankle gave out and I fell. Luckily, the file cabinet broke my fall. A lot of crashing later I was able to get up and limp home.
My husband was not amused. After a trip to the ER, IMAY have broken my ankle. They're sending me to an orthepedic doctor for a second opinion. Right now, I am on crutches and Loritab. LMK is having conniptions at the thought of me unsupervised on crutches. Heh. You'd think I was some sort of klutz. Oh wait...I AM some sort of klutz.
Please Lord, don't make me start my first year of teaching on crutches.
**Update: It's not broken! The ortho doc said I could even stop using the crutches. I may use them another day otherwise I tire out really easy.
Anyone thinking I should go back to school tomorrow morning? Yeah, me too!
Why? The Assistant Principal came to tell me that they're ordering me a 12 ft. whiteboard. Woohoo! That means that painted chalkboard is finally going to be functional! I've got a room to rearrange and bulletin boards to change! I also got enough chairs for my desks, a new computer table, a new desk chair, and a new bookshelf. Squeeeeee!
As the principal told me, it pays to be around in the summer. We think of you when you're here.
Anyone who knows me knows that I do not handle heat well. Nothing will drive me into drunken sailor-like cursing like being hot. Nothing. So with the current temperatures in Northern Virginia I am anything but pleasant. It's fucking hot!
Just to further piss me off, the air conditioning on my side of the school building isn't working. That's right, it's frickin' hot in my air conditioned school too! The administration knows there is a problem and to their credit they are doing all they know how to do to fix the problem. One of the secretaries told me today that I can either freeze or roast. Please! I will freeze!
LMK's CPAP machine is wonderful. He sleeps so quietly I find myself checking to make sure he's breathing. He's never slept so quietly. Of course, now I have to get used to sharing the bed again. Boo. When it's hot, double boo.
I think I may need to tone down the school talk. Last night, I woke LMK up because he was snoring. He sat bolt upright in bed and exclaimed, "What grade level?" Heh.
Speaking of snoring, LMK is now the proud owner/renter of a CPAP machine. Hallelujah! The very nice tech came out and showed us how to work it this afternoon. I could hardly hear the thing when she turned it on, so I'm not worried about not being able to sleep with it on. And, LMK has to keep his mouth shut when he's wearing it. Oh, those jokes just write themselves.
I sat in the computer lab so kids could come in and take AR tests today. It was interesting to say the least. One dad said he'd come back for his daughter (and son who isn't in school yet) in about a half hour, and hour later he returned. In other words, I babysat today!
One mom had an adorable little girl with her (maybe 3 at the most). Mom gave her a piece of candy which she immediately chomped. Then she wanted a piece of gum. Mom gave her gum with the strict instruction NOT to swallow it. ("It takes Benefiber to get it out of her," she confided.) Two minutes later, guess who wanted some gum. Mom said no, but got distracted helping the other kids choose new books. So the little girl just reached into Mom's purse and helped herself. Five pieces later, Mom caught on. It's gonna be an interesting weekend!
Some else, please tell me you are addicted to this site. Every day, I find some to giggle over. They're adorable.
So...I was all prepared to let go of whatever angst I was harboring regarding my classroom after that last post. As Pigs says, bygones.
However, today, as I was trying to organize my desks and failing miserably, I remembered that her desks fit in the room easily. What am I doing wrong? I have 30 desks and they're just not fitting. What the hell?
So I come home and check the pictures I took when it was her room. They're different desks!
She took the "nice" desks to her new room and gave me all the ones that are missing screws and are insanely high for 4th graders! Did I mention I have 30 desks and 18 chairs!?
Oooooo, NOW I'm pissed.
I don't think there is much I can do but try to find a way to get rid of some of the desks. I have 6 more desks than she had, where on earth do I put them!? I figure based on the numbers I've been told, if I have 25 desks, I'll be more than safe.
When I walked into my room filled with the former teacher's stuff, I almost had a panic attack. Everything was nicely organized but there was just so much stuff! There was no where to even put something down without losing it. Clutter and disorder make me anxious. I know you'd never guess that from the state of my house most of the time, but it's true. I left the room completely overwhelmed.
I checked in at school one day when she had come to move stuff. The principal suggested I go up and talk to her, so I did. Yeah. I don't think moving was her idea. Long story short, I didn't get a very friendly vibe from her, so I vacated post haste. I waited until she was done and then went back to see the room.
Everything was gone. Part of me was annoyed that she'd taken everything. However, like Carrie said, she probably bought a lot of it herself. I can understand. Heck, I would be doing the same thing.
That being said, taking the chalkboard erasers seems a little petty to me. The stuff she did leave in the room isn't all that helpful. The textbooks are in a pile on the counter. Not in nice, neat piles - just tossed on the counter. Along with the teaching manuals and whatever manipulatives come with the set. The computers are tossed on a card with cords strewn all over - no idea what cord goes to what computer or where they go. Figuring that out ought to be fun.
The one thing that makes me smile is thinking of the room that this teacher moved to. It's half the size of mine. Her new room is packed to the gills with stuff and she hasn't even gotten desks for the kids in there. Karma is a boomerang.
However, I have quite a bit of stuff myself. Not only do I have the things I've collected over the years while I was wishing for my own room, I've got stuff from teacher's I've worked with, and anything I wanted from my mom's room when she retired. Stuff, I got!
I just didn't know I should have gotten her erasers!
On a scale of 1-10, (1 being "Whatever" and 10 being "I want to jab an ice pick in someone's eye I'm so pissed") how annoyed would you be if the teacher whose room you were moving into looked like this: Considering said teacher waited 3 weeks to come clean it out when she was moving and then took everything.
Folks are still here. Both of them fell (at different times) within 24 hours of arriving. I guess I didn't stress the "our floors are super slippery" enough. Oy vey.
They're coming! My mommy and daddy are coming! It will be their first visit since we moved. I am hoping to be super busy showing them around and keeping them entertained. We're hoping to make a trip here sometime this week. (Even though Mom said she didn't see a reason to go to the amusement park or the museum - uh, Mom, why go?) So, I might be scarce around here for a week or so.
They're also bringing a bunch of my school stuff. Hooray! Now...to get that woman out of my classroom. LMK also starts summer school this week, so he'll be gone from 8 to 5 at least every day and half a day on Saturdays.
Also, a classroom blog where the kids post weekly. 'Blogger' will be one of the classroom jobs.
Since I haven't gotten my curriculum guides, teacher's editions, staff handbook, etc. I'm pretty much flying blind. I still want to be thinking about what I will do next year so I've been making lists. Here are some things I'm thinking about (I'll add to it as I think of more). Feel free to add suggestions! I'd love more ideas.
I definitely want to institute some sort of classroom economy behavior system. Pigs has been gracious enough to send me what she did and it's given me lots of ideas. The scale of the system will depend if the other teachers take part or not. I'm perfectly fine having my own system and having a school store with school supplies and privilege purchases (i.e. extra computer time, homework passes, lunch with the teacher, etc.).
I'm thinking of creating some sort of attendance incentive. One teacher I used to work for had a pizza cut into eight pieces displayed in his room. If everyone in the class was in school (no tardies and no early dismissals) he gave them a slice of pizza. When they earned the whole pizza they got a pizza party. That sounds do-able.
I've been perusing the state standards and math ought to prove interesting. One word. Fractions. Luckily, I live with a math teacher than can explain any concepts I've forgotten. It sounds like I'll be teaching either social studies or science. I don't know which I'll have. Science seems interesting - electricity, plants and life processes, ecosystems, adaption, weather, etc. Social Studies isn't as clear. I think it's Virginia studies which could prove challenging for a non-Virginia native.
The first day of school, I think I will introduce myself with "Me in a Bag." Then I'll give the kids a paper bag to create their own Me in a Bag. I'm thinking I will give the kids lunch size bags, that way there is less of a chance they can bring in inappropriate things. Still thinking on this one.
My classroom website is already being created. I've put some basic things up but I'm open to suggestions on pages I should definitely include. I figured a homework page would be good. That way kids have less of an excuse about not knowing what the homework was if they're out of class or go home early.
After a lot of nagging (a LOT!), Molly, who just moved to Missouri, finally got a blog. Woohoo!
The girl needed a blog. She's a wonderful writer, takes great photographs, just moved away from home, and has to live with some of my extended family. She's in the running for sainthood in my book.
Now, to help her beautify her blog. I'm already planning to "show" her how to get a flickr badge, Haloscan comments, and a better template.
So please, swing by, oogle her furbabies and welcome her to blogging.
It's looking like LMK and I will officially be going to Chicago in August (the week before my birthday, coincidentally).
He's been invited to a coaching symposium (*yawn*) and I've always wanted to visit Chicago. From what I can remember of what he's told me, the US Women's National Team is putting on the symposium. Head Coach went to the one the US Men's National Team did in Cleveland last year. LMK has been jealous ever since.
The best news? Twin might be able to come, too. Correction, she wants to come, she just needs to make sure she can get the time off of work. If Twin comes, this trip will be lots of fun. Just like our trip to Jamestown...We Love Soccer, not We Love Lucy. I'll have someone to play with while LMK is at his soccer stuff. We will be able to attend the game with him though. So that will be fun. Twin enjoys soccer like I do. Meaning, we don't care about strategy - we're there for the cards! What should Twin and I do for the day and a half we'll have to occupy ourselves?
Should I be worried that he all but giggled like a schoolgirl when he found out he'd be attending not only the game against New Zealand but also a practice? It's nice to see him so excited. Evidently some big coach is going to be there too. I believe he called him the goalkeeping coach God.
As most of you have guessed from my previous entry, I got the job! Hooray! Cue happy dance.
Tuesday afternoon, I went to my interview. I didn't have a lot of expectations because I'd interviewed before, but hadn't gotten the job. I did however, have lots of people "pulling" for me. Family, friends, LMK's work friends, people from my school in Ohio, people on one of the message boards I frequent. I'd gotten tips from my aunt's sister who interviews people ALL the time. There was good karma on my side. I was ready.
The interview went very much like last time. It was for a 4th grade job. They have 13 standard questions they ask everyone. I answered those pretty similarly to how I answered them before, or I think I did. I even got a few laughs - very much my personality. Then they asked me additional questions like how I would handle a disgruntled parent. I asked the teachers what their favorite thing about working at the school was (go me thinking up a question on the spur of a moment). Someone mentioned an after school program which sounds like a lot of fun. One of the teachers on the committee then asked if I was willing to stay after school. Well, definitely! I've done it before with tutoring in Ohio. The interview ended with a quick tour of the 4th grade hall, which was fun. I gathered my things, thanked everyone, and left.
After I left I ran to get thank you notes. I had some from the last interview, but I didn't have enough for everyone. I picked up the cards and a drink and went to LMK's classroom. I decided then and there to just fill them out and we'd drop them off on our way home.
We pulled into the school's parking lot about a half hour after the last meeting was to start. I took my thank you cards into the office and gave them to the secretary to hand out. The committee was still in the office meeting. As I was leaving, the principal called me into the room. The secretary gave me back the cards and I proceeded to distribute them. The principal commented on how I was quick on the turn around. Then she said, "Well, we're glad you came back. We've been talking and we've decided to offer you the job."
I swear to you, I forgot my own name at that moment. I blurted out an, "Okay!" I sat down and discussed some job details (including being offered the biggest classroom in the school - sweet!). I didn't linger. I thanked everyone again and told them I would be speaking with them soon. As I was leaving I spoke with the secretaries, who have always been really nice. One told me how the 3rd grade teachers raved about me after I subbed there. I honestly believe that they're a large part of the reason I got this job.
As I left the office, I couldn't stop smiling. I even got a little case of the sniffles. Luckily, I got myself together and put on a somber face for LMK. I got in the car and apologized for taking so long. "There were people talking and I didn't want to interrupt," I told him. I started the car, rolled up the windows, and started backing out of my parking space.
Me: "So...are you still planning on going to Large City this weekend?" LMK: "Yeah. Why?" Me: "Well...I just wondered, since I'm in the market for an iPod." LMK (momentarily puzzled): "You're...oh my God! You got the job!" Me (grinning like the goober I am): "Yup."
There was much whooping and hollering going on in that car. As we were leaving we got out to call people. I made him call my mother first who promptly burst into tears. Gotta love her. "I told your dad we had to go to church this week," she said. Heh. Thanks, God. :o)
Repeat that reaction about 10 times and you have the reactions of my family and friends. Twin said she had to call her mom who had been worrying about me. I love my family and friends.
I am waiting on an official call from the HR guy next week, but it looks like I will be a 4th grade teacher next year. I'm already making lists. Lists of lists of lists!
I have so much time and so little to do! Strike that, reverse it. (bonus points for the reference)
Have I mentioned I have a job interview tomorrow? At the same school where I didn't get the job last time?
Trying not to get my hopes up. Hopefully, I will soon be in the market for an iPod.
The kids are all leaving by Friday. The Stalkers will leave then. One will not be returning. LMK and I were saying today how much we're going to miss her. It doesn't help that they've decided that we're going to adopt them. They both have pretty absent fathers, so I'm not surprised they've attached themselves to LMK. An adult male that respects them, thinks they're wonderful, and isn't afraid to put his foot down when he feels they need it. Nope, they're not crying out for a father figure.
They're good kids. They wrote the nicest stuff in LMK's yearbook (he gets a yearbook, interesting). I love this time of year, yet, I dread this time of year. Change is constant; boy, do I hate that.
Oh, we got notice last night that LMK got his first student gift. He's excited...but hiding it well.
LMK is attending graduation today. It started at 10 o'clock. Anyone willing to be on exactly how long he's gone? Did I mention the location they're having graduation is indoors and un-airconditioned? And that it's supposed to be about 90 today? And that he's wearing long pants, dress shirt, tie, blazer, and graduation robes? Ohhhh, I do not envy him.
Of course, he's probably enjoying being away from me. As he should be. I've been in a really crappy mood since I got back from Ohio. It's nothing he's done, but he's getting punished. You'd think that would make me act right, it doesn't. As stuff comes out of my mouth, I realize how stupid I'm being. I'm sleeping way too much (12+ hours a night usually). Saying one thing, then saying the exact opposite. I swear, it's like I'm not myself anymore. Hopefully next week, I'll get my act together.
Molly left for Missouri today. She's the one that I'll really miss. Molly's getting the raw end of the deal anyway. Moving away from her friends, her family, her job and not getting a whole lot in return. I just hope she'll be happy there. Even though I want her back in Ohio with her family and near my mom. People who worry about her and put her needs at the top of the list. I'm not sure she'll get that where she's going now.
I must sound awful, but I know this is upsetting my uncle. My mother, well, she's a mess about it too. And if my grandfather were alive, he would be upset too - as it is, I'm sure he's churning in his grave. Molly's upset too. I hate when the people I love are upset and what's worse the ones doing it don't even seem to care. LMK and I might have moved, but we didn't sell the farm that's been in the family for over 100 years. Hell, we didn't even sell the house that's been in the family for 50 years. We just moved.
They're all gone. I miss them already and I'm not even there! My cousin, Mo Mom, requested a video of the farm. I've been against it for over a year. THEY wanted to move, THEY can deal with it. Don't get me wrong, I still feel that way, but I've got it just about finished. I'm waiting on pictures from the going away party from my brother. Honestly, the video doesn't make me sad, it still seems surreal. Ok, if I can make it through the first 25 seconds, I'm ok. If the video was something I wanted to do, I would go through and scan older pictures of the farm, but I honestly don't want to do that.
I uploaded a severely edited version of the video. You can watch it here. I don't particularly care for the song, but it's what Mo Mom requested. Names eliminated and people removed to protect the guilty.
